I?m so ugly...I worked in a pet shop, and people
kept asking how big I?d get.
The Department of Family Planning wanted to make
me poster boy - for birth control.
My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in
his lap; he was in the electric chair.
I was so poor growing up ... if I wasn't a boy ... I'd
have had nothing to play with.
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a
toaster and radio.
I was such an ugly baby...My mother never breast-fed me.
She told me that she only liked me as a friend.
I'm so ugly...My father carries around a picture of the
kid who came with his wallet.
When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting
room and said to my father; I'm sorry.
We did everything we could, but he pulled through.
I'm so ugly...My mother had morning sickness
...AFTER I was born.
A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over;
nobody?s home. I went over. Nobody was home.
I was such an ugly kid...When I played in the sandbox;
the cat kept covering me up.
kept asking how big I?d get.
The Department of Family Planning wanted to make
me poster boy - for birth control.
My uncle's dying wish was to have me sitting in
his lap; he was in the electric chair.
I was so poor growing up ... if I wasn't a boy ... I'd
have had nothing to play with.
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a
toaster and radio.
I was such an ugly baby...My mother never breast-fed me.
She told me that she only liked me as a friend.
I'm so ugly...My father carries around a picture of the
kid who came with his wallet.
When I was born, the doctor came into the waiting
room and said to my father; I'm sorry.
We did everything we could, but he pulled through.
I'm so ugly...My mother had morning sickness
...AFTER I was born.
A girl phoned me the other day and said, "Come on over;
nobody?s home. I went over. Nobody was home.
I was such an ugly kid...When I played in the sandbox;
the cat kept covering me up.