God its like the 4th time Iv posted these...
For similar stories others posted and all new stories by me and other GameFAQS members go here
<span style="color:red">Story #1</span>
Leon quickly gets inside a closet. He is breathing heavily, he must've been running from something. Was it a Zombie? Ganados?
Jill: Hey
Leon: WAHHH!! Oh, its you. Why are you in here?
Jill points out at a window in the closet (yes, theres a window in the closet). Wesker is seen panthing and clawing at the window
Wesker: Jill! Jill I need you! Let me in now or you'll have eternal detantion in my dungeon of pleasure! JILL!!!
Jill: How 'bout you?
Leon points out of a window (yes, there are 2 windows in the closet). Brad is seen, panthing and clawing at the window.
Brad: Leon, you know you love me too! Get out of there and we could live together on a beatiful mansion in the forest just like I always dreamed we would! We could even remove the zombies! Leon!
Leon: No, Im never coming out of the closet!
Jill: Chris is such an ass. I asked him on a date and he's all "No, I have to go shoot some zombies" and im like "Fine, I liked Leon better anyway" and he--
Leon: OMG shut up woman!
Jill: Well im just saying he's a big steaming pile of--
Chris: *ahem*
jill and Leon: Chris!? Your here too?
Leon: What are you hiding from?
Chris: Dumbo over there
Chris points out the window (yes, 3 windows in a closet). Ashley is seen, panting at the door.
Leon: *gasp*
Jill: the only thing that would make this stranger is--
Steve: Meee yeaaaah!
Chris: Wow, is this the school bunker? What are you hiding from?
Steve points out the window (You get the point) and Mr. Salvador (Mr. as in the double bladed) is seen at he window, growling and revving his chainsaw. He starts cutting a hole in the wall and Wesker, Ashley, and Brad all run to the forming opening
Steve, Jill, Leon, Chris: OH ****!!!
the wall breaks open, screams and moans are heard the lights go off.
*long pause*
Jill: Whats that in my behind?
Wesker: Me *wink*
Jill: The front?
Leon: Me.
Barry: JILL SANDWICH!!!!!
Leon: Whats that thing in my ear? Ow, its big, that hurts! My braaain! Who is it?
Brad: Me *wink*. But whats that in my face?
Ashley:Me, hehe, wrong person...But whats that in my nose???
Steve: Oops, I was aiming for Jill...
Chris: So steve, is that you in my behind?
Steve: No dude, im not like that...
Chris: Then it must be...
REV REEEEEV!
Chris: OOOOOWWWWWWWWW!!!!
Steve: But I feel something on my face...
Wesker: Thats me.
Steve: But isnt that in Jill?
Wekser: Who said I only have one?
Steve, Chris, Jill, Leon, Mr. Salvador, Brad: O_O
<span style="color:blue">Story 2</span>
*School assembly*
Wesker: Okay, today we are going to take your pictres. Leon, we start with you.
Leon: Oh, hold on, let me just fix up my hair a second.
Wesker: We're not taking a picture of your face *wink*...
School:
<span style="colorrange">Story 3</span>
*Cheesy lines class*
Barry: So make sure you are always saying something laughibly cheesy and with bad acting.
Jill: Acting? What are we, in some sort of movie or game?
Barry: hahah, of course not! *wink*
Okay, so here an example. ROLE PLAY PEOPLE!!! Jill, lets pretend that our boss just got lost in a huge zombie infested mansion in the Arklay mountains on the outskirt of Raccon City--
Jill: Like that's ever gonna happen.
Leon: Wait, is it Arklay? Or Arcley? Or is it--
Barry: THIS ISNT GEOGRAPHY CLASS NOW SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I PULL OFF YOUR PANTS AND-- Well lets just leave that alone for awhile. Now where was I? Oh yes, so I go "I think you, the master of unlocking, could use this"
Jill: ROFLMAO!!!
Barry: WE DONT SPEAK IN ACRONYMS NOW TAKE YOUR INTERNET LINGO OUT OF MY CLASS BEFORE I GET ON MY KNEES AND LICK YOUR-- phew, gotta get ahold of yourself barry...Now Leon, you try.
Leon: No thanks, BRO!
Barry: Perfect!! Jill?
Jill: You want S.T.A.R.S.? Ill give you stars...
Barry: But I dont want stars, I want cheesy lines dammit! an F for you!
*Weskers office*
Wesker: Jill senses tingling! *gets on PA* BARRY LEAVE JILL ALONE AND GET TO MY OFFICE NOW!
Barry enters
Barry: Why the yelling? I thought we develeoped a real relationship last night...
Wesker: Yes, but you insulted my beloved Jill and gave her an F! You F'ed her! Only I can F her! But ill forgive you if you get on your kness.
Barry: Oh I like the way you think.
Wesker: ok, 1, 2, 3 *thrust through barrys head*
Leon pops his head through the door: WANGPALE'D11!!
<span style="color:green">Story 4</span>
Hallway
Chris: Leon, you bastard, you're so lucky! All the ladies want you!
Jill: I dont.
Chris: Exactly
Leon: But they arent ladies. That ones Wesker.
Wesker: Hehe, oh dont mind lil ol' Weskita here! Oh no, im not principal Wesker in disguise! *wig falls off* Oops! Um, darn T-Virus, causin the hair loss...
Leon:...And that ones Brad.
Brad: Yeah, Im Weskita's best friend! And my daddy's rich and um, im totally not a guy! *please date me!*
*little green ball with stuff rolls by*
Jill: wtf?
Wesker: Ohhhhh a baaaaaall *mesmurized**chases after ball* *ball rolls into Leons pants*
Leon: Well that cant be a good thing...
the green ball and Wekser go inside Leons pants. Leon cries and spasms around. The ball comes out covered in white stuff and with Leons boxers. Wesker doesnt come out. Leons face is permenantley frozen in a face
Cartman: Thats what I call a sticky situation!
Brad: Hey, I called dibs Wesker!
Nemesis walks by
Nemesis: M.U.S.T. K.I.L.L. B.R.A.D.
Chris: So how exactly do you speak in caps?
Nemi tentacles come out and rub up on brad
Brad: Ohh, screw Leon, I found my man. In my mouth please. Hey, you're too low, thats my neck stupid! go higher! ARGH! *tentacle goes through brads neck*
Barry: Now thats what I call an exiting death *wink wink*
*bigger green ball rolls by window out side*
Jill: You know, Chris, with all this love in the air <_< >_>...
Chris: *getting excited in more ways than one* Yes...?
Jill: Well I was thinking that maybe...
Chris: OH YEAH BABY!
Jill: What? No not you! *turns to other side and makes out with claire*
Chris: Thats my sister! Now im all alone...
Ashley: You got me...
Chris:...*makes out with Salvador*
*green sticky ball rolls over everyone, and they get stuck to it*
Jill: WTF?!?!?!?
Barry: What is it!?
Chris: Na naaa nanananananana na katamari--
Jill: Nows no time for singing Chris! We're about to become--
Nemesis: <span style="color:red">S.</span><span style="colorurple">T.</span><span style="color:yellow">A.</span> <span style="color:green">R.</span><span style="color:blue">S.</span>
*Katamari Damacy refrence if you didnt get it...*
<span style="color:gray">Story 5</span>
[Spanish Class with Salazar]
Leon: Man, I hate spanish class. I mean when will I use spanish? Its not like I'll ever be trapped in spain while trying to rescue Ashley or something...
Ashley: haha, no of course not, thats silly!
Chris: Oh happy-go-lucky Leon...
Leon: Dude, stop now, you sound like Brad
Brad:*insulted* Hey!
Leon winks at Brad
Class:
Leon: NO ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, I HAVE SOMETHING IN MY EYE!
Brad: Oh comon Leon, you know you want me...
Jill: Where's Salazaar anyway?
Chris: Teachers meeting.
[Faculty room]
Wekser: okay, its time for our "teachers meeting". Positions people! Salazaar, you're the perfect height, so you stand in front of my waist, facing me. Karuser, you got that monster "arm" of yours so you get behind me. Nemmy, you got multiple, so you stand on the side and do everyone. Merchant, you got that "rocket launcher", so you stand behind krauser, and Barry will...
[Back in class]
Leon: What do they do at those meeting anyway?
Jill: Dunno, but they come back all sweaty, naked, and sometimes with pee on their face...
Rebecca:I know! They must be doing science work on the human body!
Substitute: Well I guess You could say that...
Hey, you two back their, cut that out, we're in class!
Leon and Brad are in the back of class, and very close.
Leon: NO, ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE! I was just, um, cleaning his boxers with my mouth!
*entire class heads explode*
*Shinji Mikami walks in*
Mikami: Oh damnit, there go all my actors! Now I can never make my game! Im ruined! WAIT! I have a map! We can use it to get to Skull Island and--
Assistant guy: Uh, sir?
Mikami: Yes?!
Assistant: Your actors are all right in front of you.
Mikami looks foward to see that he is in a studio, with voice actors to all his games standing in front of him.
Mikami: Bu--wha--IM GOING INSANE!!
Assistant guy: Uh sir?
Mikami: YES?!
Assistant guy: Are you okay?
Hideo Kojima is sitting in his office
Hideo: Damn, that was as ****** up as my games!
<span style="color:red">Story 6</span> <span style="colorrange">DA</span><span style="color:green">NCE</span> <span style="color:blue">EDITION</span>
New guy: Why is everyone afraid of the principal?
Jill: Well, he likes to molest...
New guy: What? What do you mean?
Jill: Well, its easier to express...IN SONG FORM!!
*entire school breaks out in cordinated dance and singing*
School: He is Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the Molester! Be it Jill or Chris or Krauser, he really doesnt care! He's Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the Molester! He'll haunt you in your dreams and call you on the PA! Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the molester! He's scarier than the biggest meanest nastiest monster because he's *song continues*
New guy: WOW! I completley understand!
For similar stories others posted and all new stories by me and other GameFAQS members go here
<span style="color:red">Story #1</span>
Leon quickly gets inside a closet. He is breathing heavily, he must've been running from something. Was it a Zombie? Ganados?
Jill: Hey
Leon: WAHHH!! Oh, its you. Why are you in here?
Jill points out at a window in the closet (yes, theres a window in the closet). Wesker is seen panthing and clawing at the window
Wesker: Jill! Jill I need you! Let me in now or you'll have eternal detantion in my dungeon of pleasure! JILL!!!
Jill: How 'bout you?
Leon points out of a window (yes, there are 2 windows in the closet). Brad is seen, panthing and clawing at the window.
Brad: Leon, you know you love me too! Get out of there and we could live together on a beatiful mansion in the forest just like I always dreamed we would! We could even remove the zombies! Leon!
Leon: No, Im never coming out of the closet!
Jill: Chris is such an ass. I asked him on a date and he's all "No, I have to go shoot some zombies" and im like "Fine, I liked Leon better anyway" and he--
Leon: OMG shut up woman!
Jill: Well im just saying he's a big steaming pile of--
Chris: *ahem*
jill and Leon: Chris!? Your here too?
Leon: What are you hiding from?
Chris: Dumbo over there
Chris points out the window (yes, 3 windows in a closet). Ashley is seen, panting at the door.
Leon: *gasp*
Jill: the only thing that would make this stranger is--
Steve: Meee yeaaaah!
Chris: Wow, is this the school bunker? What are you hiding from?
Steve points out the window (You get the point) and Mr. Salvador (Mr. as in the double bladed) is seen at he window, growling and revving his chainsaw. He starts cutting a hole in the wall and Wesker, Ashley, and Brad all run to the forming opening
Steve, Jill, Leon, Chris: OH ****!!!
the wall breaks open, screams and moans are heard the lights go off.
*long pause*
Jill: Whats that in my behind?
Wesker: Me *wink*
Jill: The front?
Leon: Me.
Barry: JILL SANDWICH!!!!!
Leon: Whats that thing in my ear? Ow, its big, that hurts! My braaain! Who is it?
Brad: Me *wink*. But whats that in my face?
Ashley:Me, hehe, wrong person...But whats that in my nose???
Steve: Oops, I was aiming for Jill...
Chris: So steve, is that you in my behind?
Steve: No dude, im not like that...
Chris: Then it must be...
REV REEEEEV!
Chris: OOOOOWWWWWWWWW!!!!
Steve: But I feel something on my face...
Wesker: Thats me.
Steve: But isnt that in Jill?
Wekser: Who said I only have one?
Steve, Chris, Jill, Leon, Mr. Salvador, Brad: O_O
<span style="color:blue">Story 2</span>
*School assembly*
Wesker: Okay, today we are going to take your pictres. Leon, we start with you.
Leon: Oh, hold on, let me just fix up my hair a second.
Wesker: We're not taking a picture of your face *wink*...
School:
<span style="color
range">Story 3</span>*Cheesy lines class*
Barry: So make sure you are always saying something laughibly cheesy and with bad acting.
Jill: Acting? What are we, in some sort of movie or game?
Barry: hahah, of course not! *wink*
Okay, so here an example. ROLE PLAY PEOPLE!!! Jill, lets pretend that our boss just got lost in a huge zombie infested mansion in the Arklay mountains on the outskirt of Raccon City--
Jill: Like that's ever gonna happen.
Leon: Wait, is it Arklay? Or Arcley? Or is it--
Barry: THIS ISNT GEOGRAPHY CLASS NOW SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I PULL OFF YOUR PANTS AND-- Well lets just leave that alone for awhile. Now where was I? Oh yes, so I go "I think you, the master of unlocking, could use this"
Jill: ROFLMAO!!!
Barry: WE DONT SPEAK IN ACRONYMS NOW TAKE YOUR INTERNET LINGO OUT OF MY CLASS BEFORE I GET ON MY KNEES AND LICK YOUR-- phew, gotta get ahold of yourself barry...Now Leon, you try.
Leon: No thanks, BRO!
Barry: Perfect!! Jill?
Jill: You want S.T.A.R.S.? Ill give you stars...
Barry: But I dont want stars, I want cheesy lines dammit! an F for you!
*Weskers office*
Wesker: Jill senses tingling! *gets on PA* BARRY LEAVE JILL ALONE AND GET TO MY OFFICE NOW!
Barry enters
Barry: Why the yelling? I thought we develeoped a real relationship last night...
Wesker: Yes, but you insulted my beloved Jill and gave her an F! You F'ed her! Only I can F her! But ill forgive you if you get on your kness.
Barry: Oh I like the way you think.
Wesker: ok, 1, 2, 3 *thrust through barrys head*
Leon pops his head through the door: WANGPALE'D11!!
<span style="color:green">Story 4</span>
Hallway
Chris: Leon, you bastard, you're so lucky! All the ladies want you!
Jill: I dont.
Chris: Exactly
Leon: But they arent ladies. That ones Wesker.
Wesker: Hehe, oh dont mind lil ol' Weskita here! Oh no, im not principal Wesker in disguise! *wig falls off* Oops! Um, darn T-Virus, causin the hair loss...
Leon:...And that ones Brad.
Brad: Yeah, Im Weskita's best friend! And my daddy's rich and um, im totally not a guy! *please date me!*
*little green ball with stuff rolls by*
Jill: wtf?
Wesker: Ohhhhh a baaaaaall *mesmurized**chases after ball* *ball rolls into Leons pants*
Leon: Well that cant be a good thing...
the green ball and Wekser go inside Leons pants. Leon cries and spasms around. The ball comes out covered in white stuff and with Leons boxers. Wesker doesnt come out. Leons face is permenantley frozen in a
faceCartman: Thats what I call a sticky situation!
Brad: Hey, I called dibs Wesker!
Nemesis walks by
Nemesis: M.U.S.T. K.I.L.L. B.R.A.D.
Chris: So how exactly do you speak in caps?
Nemi tentacles come out and rub up on brad
Brad: Ohh, screw Leon, I found my man. In my mouth please. Hey, you're too low, thats my neck stupid! go higher! ARGH! *tentacle goes through brads neck*
Barry: Now thats what I call an exiting death *wink wink*
*bigger green ball rolls by window out side*
Jill: You know, Chris, with all this love in the air <_< >_>...
Chris: *getting excited in more ways than one* Yes...?
Jill: Well I was thinking that maybe...
Chris: OH YEAH BABY!
Jill: What? No not you! *turns to other side and makes out with claire*
Chris: Thats my sister! Now im all alone...
Ashley: You got me...
Chris:...*makes out with Salvador*
*green sticky ball rolls over everyone, and they get stuck to it*
Jill: WTF?!?!?!?
Barry: What is it!?
Chris: Na naaa nanananananana na katamari--
Jill: Nows no time for singing Chris! We're about to become--
Nemesis: <span style="color:red">S.</span><span style="color
urple">T.</span><span style="color:yellow">A.</span> <span style="color:green">R.</span><span style="color:blue">S.</span>*Katamari Damacy refrence if you didnt get it...*
<span style="color:gray">Story 5</span>
[Spanish Class with Salazar]
Leon: Man, I hate spanish class. I mean when will I use spanish? Its not like I'll ever be trapped in spain while trying to rescue Ashley or something...
Ashley: haha, no of course not, thats silly!
Chris: Oh happy-go-lucky Leon...
Leon: Dude, stop now, you sound like Brad
Brad:*insulted* Hey!
Leon winks at Brad
Class:
Leon: NO ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, I HAVE SOMETHING IN MY EYE!
Brad: Oh comon Leon, you know you want me...
Jill: Where's Salazaar anyway?
Chris: Teachers meeting.
[Faculty room]
Wekser: okay, its time for our "teachers meeting". Positions people! Salazaar, you're the perfect height, so you stand in front of my waist, facing me. Karuser, you got that monster "arm" of yours so you get behind me. Nemmy, you got multiple, so you stand on the side and do everyone. Merchant, you got that "rocket launcher", so you stand behind krauser, and Barry will...
[Back in class]
Leon: What do they do at those meeting anyway?
Jill: Dunno, but they come back all sweaty, naked, and sometimes with pee on their face...
Rebecca:I know! They must be doing science work on the human body!
Substitute: Well I guess You could say that...
Hey, you two back their, cut that out, we're in class!
Leon and Brad are in the back of class, and very close.
Leon: NO, ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE! I was just, um, cleaning his boxers with my mouth!
*entire class heads explode*
*Shinji Mikami walks in*
Mikami: Oh damnit, there go all my actors! Now I can never make my game! Im ruined! WAIT! I have a map! We can use it to get to Skull Island and--
Assistant guy: Uh, sir?
Mikami: Yes?!
Assistant: Your actors are all right in front of you.
Mikami looks foward to see that he is in a studio, with voice actors to all his games standing in front of him.
Mikami: Bu--wha--IM GOING INSANE!!
Assistant guy: Uh sir?
Mikami: YES?!
Assistant guy: Are you okay?
Hideo Kojima is sitting in his office
Hideo: Damn, that was as ****** up as my games!
<span style="color:red">Story 6</span> <span style="color
range">DA</span><span style="color:green">NCE</span> <span style="color:blue">EDITION</span>New guy: Why is everyone afraid of the principal?
Jill: Well, he likes to molest...
New guy: What? What do you mean?
Jill: Well, its easier to express...IN SONG FORM!!
*entire school breaks out in cordinated dance and singing*
School: He is Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the Molester! Be it Jill or Chris or Krauser, he really doesnt care! He's Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the Molester! He'll haunt you in your dreams and call you on the PA! Wesker, Wesker, Wesker the molester! He's scarier than the biggest meanest nastiest monster because he's *song continues*
New guy: WOW! I completley understand!